I did not receive the email from John Van Horn, because he probably does not know who I am
Or perhaps his request ended up in the email folder with all of the consultant’s spam
But a forwarded copy arrived from a coworker as a hint that I should profess my adoration
Of the parking business that has been the love of my life, and deserves a brief narration
A four-hundred-word limit does not allow me to properly express my appreciation and respect
For the greatest industry in the world, with new technology being my favorite sect
From a part-time college job as a parking attendant, to an international parking career
I am blessed with many great colleagues, but it’s the customers I truly revere
Like the customer who gets their car impounded for violating rules they said they did not know
Despite prior written warnings and the large metal clamp attached to the wheel of their Volvo
We love the citation appeal expert who takes photos of their parked vehicle and missing regulatory sign
Then writes a letter to the mayor about a broken parking meter and continues to rant and whine
Or the tailgater at football game who thinks they can take up three spaces and half of the aisle for free
And the drunk fan who pukes in the trashcan and can’t wait in line at the porta-potty to pee
We love the customer who expects parking to be free, even if the merchant did not validate
Then puts their car in park until we agree to open the gate
Or the thrifty parking lot owner who bought one pay station ten years ago to manage a huge parking lot
And doesn’t believe in preventative maintenance, but expects the technician to be there on the spot
Then claims loss of revenue and believes a parts warranty should cover labor, too
And complains about the invoice and thinks his decade old meter should still work like new
We also love the parking operator who likes to change rates almost every day
Crunching data and running reports to determine how much each customer should pay
It’s Donald Shoup’s fault, of course, for writing the bible on improving utilization
We mostly love that The High Cost of Free Parking has created more paid parking across this great nation